Tonight I was following routine and I dropped by my local video store on the way home to exchange some online rentals with a couple new releases. As I was approaching the checkout line I saw a lady and two younger girls looking at the BluRay display of the new Twilight movie that is hitting shelves in the near future. I jokingly said, "Once you go blue you don't go back." A vibe hit me that these ladies were not just fascinated by the picture quality that BluRay has to offer, but it was something that they wished they could have for themselves.
As I stood in line and waited for my online movies to be checked in, a thought kept running through my mind. I wanted to do something for these complete strangers. Finally, right before the moment where the movies are handed to me and sent on my way; my heart started doing the thinking.
I looked over at the mother and the two girls and asked them if they wanted a BluRay player. Words cannot describe the expression of disbelief that was on their faces. I kindly explained that I had one of the first BluRay players at home that I did not use since I purchased a Sony Play Station 3 to play my movies. To illustrate that I was serious I went on to say that I did not use the device and it would be nice for someone to be able to enjoy it. In order to not make them feel awkward I let them know I would drop it by the video store for them to pick up.
Grinning from ear to ear, the woman thanked me and let me know that I had just made a single mother's holiday. I really did not know what to say besides that I wanted to give without expectations and it would be my pleasure to bring joy to another. I am going to plug in the BluRay player tonight, test it out, and find a couple BluRay Titles to give them to along with it. Not only will they have a new movie watching experience, but also they will have a couple films to start their collection. The two women working at the video store counter were shocked by this as well and told the mother that it was the same price to rent BluRay as it was to rent DVD.
About a year ago I used to get a rush spending money on over-the-top or big ticket items. It made me feel worthy, powerful, unique, or some type of prestige to show myself that I could buy frivolous toys. Now I am in the spirit of giving. Why would I possibly want to continue to give when my perception of the past tells me I have given so much with so little in return? The answer is simple. It is my destiny and I cannot walk above the path upon which my feet were placed.
With that being said I believe that I have come pretty far over a short period of time. The saying that people will not change and cannot change unless they really want to is ever-so true. Something inside of me didn't want to let go of the cynicism that shaped my reality. I was jaded from what is beautiful and only saw the putrid. My mind was on a warpath of trying to enhance my spiritual wealth through spending sprees. No longer do I do such foolish things. What I take from all of this is that truly being grateful, (which leads to true happiness), requires us to perform an act that retailers, corporations and individuals dread.
Inventory, in order for us to have any hope of seeing the glass as half-full or being content in our own skin, we must do an inventory of what we have versus the mindless chasing of desirables. I stand here and say I have: my health; family; a new outlook on life; and the possibilities are endless. Notice how I didn't mention any material items. It is my belief that when we evaluate our material items it puts us on the plane of dissatisfaction, where more is never enough.
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